just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
Randomize
