she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
