Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
Randomize
