Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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