my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
