vagina is talking i cant
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
