what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
Let's get the cat blown out
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
