Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
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