he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I will die if light touches me.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Randomize
