did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize
