we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
There are leaves in my underwear?
Randomize
