I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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