Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
