I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
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