Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Randomize
