Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
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