My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
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