Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Randomize
