don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
