The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Randomize
