i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Randomize
