This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
I forgot how hot balto sounded
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
Randomize
