im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
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