I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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