I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
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