I can't watch pbs sober anymore
She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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