A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
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