He asked to "fluff my boner.."
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
Randomize
