I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Randomize
