guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Randomize
