make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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