The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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