Where are you?
In a non slutty way
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
