We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
Randomize
