Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
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