i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
Randomize