oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
Alive.
So much puke
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Randomize
