HIV tests are more positive than that guy
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
Holy sore nipples Batman
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize
