I only kidnapped one of them. chill
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
I understand Curling. That high.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Randomize
