our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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