playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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