My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
