I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
Randomize