Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Randomize
