Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
it's like heaven, but drunker
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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