hotel room ftw
I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
literally had 100 drinks last night.
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
high people should be assigned attendants
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
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