I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
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