You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize
