it was like eating out sand paper
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Randomize
