Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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